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Sequatchie County Stories

Patience of Rutherford

Teresa 

My addiction started almost 20 years ago. Like many others, I started
out socially drinking and then smoking pot. Eventually I started doing meth. It
didn’t take long before meth started to control me, and it quickly started to
destroy my life and those I loved the most. Yet, instead of stopping, my
addiction only got worse. It’s like the more I lost and the more I hurt those I
loved, the deeper I got into my addiction. And it wasn’t only the drugs that I
became addicted to. It was the lifestyle. It was to numb all the hurt and the
pain. Because then I’d have to admit that I was the one causing it. It didn’t
take long at all before my addiction completely consumed me. I was no longer
the daughter, sister or mother I used to be and wanted to be. I no longer even
knew who that person was. I went from using to living a life that was all about
drugs.

So many years of my life I can’t even remember. My children lost out on
having a mother for most of their lives. Even when they were with me, it wasn’t
really me. They only had a shell of their mother. All those years with so many
people that called me “friend.” All those times I thought that was “the way to
live.” Only to look back and look around and see but a few “friends” still in
my life and “that way to live” was actually what stole my life. I have seven
months sober. Though I’ve been sober over a year before, this time I know I am
DONE!! So many people I’ve loved are either dead, in prison or spent a majority
of their lives behind bars. One bad day today is worth a thousand good days
from back then.